Almost regular musings of a (somewhat confused) graphic designer.

Archive for the tag “birthday”

28 and not THAT young anymore…

So, I just celebrated my 28th birthday last week. Freaking OLD! Yes. Somehow I do feel older from like just two years ago? I realised this lack of youthful energy when I’m sleeping more and looking forward to relaxing after a day of commuting. Is it really me getting older and increasingly tired, or is it really just a health issue needing to be addressed? 20 mins of dancing could send me panting to the bar stands catching my breath – loss of stamina? I hope not. Since the mid of last year, I’ve been constantly worrying that I’m physically ageing rapidly. Worrying isn’t exactly a good sign either. When you’re a worrier, you just age faster. Although some people were being nice by saying that I’m looking younger everday, I still feel quite doubtful. Two things  could probably be the culprits here; alcohol and depression.

In a boring country like Singapore, (some of you may dispute here, but honestly, if you earn x amount of money, you really can’t do virtually any fun things thinkable to do in Singapore, cuz everything involves a lot of money. Whereas if you earn 100x amount of money, the sky’s the limit) your options are pretty numbered firstly because this is a small country, and considering my meagre pay, the fancy $35 meals are totally out of the question. So what else could you think of that could be worth that $50 weekend? Alcohol. Mmhmm, unless you’re not a lightweight, $20 or less on two pints could be well enough worth it for you to be feeling chirpier. I find that I’m highly strung nearly all the time. I probably have an answer for that – unhappiness. That is mostly due to the shit quality of living that I’m facing, I’m definitely unhappy with the quality of my life and the living conditions of what I supposedly call “home”, to contribute to that dismissing depression of my “home”, the relationship with the boyfriend is probably now at its worst stage. With my compulsive need to go out every weekend and drink (because I really don’t want to stay at home), I find myself more lethargic. Alcohol and Depression works hand in hand like a vicious cycle in which you can never seem to escape once you’re caught in its spokes. You get happy for that few hours, but then when you go back to that dreadful, depressive place you call “home”, it just hits you even harder, like a ton of bricks. Completely sloshed, and feeling even shitty than before but the mood in the house didn’t change. And for that it has been a butterfly effect until I can truly make that decision to throw a wrench in those spokes wheels.

Happy 28th at Kinara with one of my closest friends

Happy 28th at Kinara with one of my closest friends


Progressive rock and the men of March

What is it about this band, that I have been extensively listening to for the past three weeks? I can’t remember at what point did I decide to rekindle my love for this band. And consecutively for three solid weeks. I began paying very close attention to all their lyrics and musical arrangements because to be honest, David Gilmour is such a master at his work. His sounds make the most lovely haunting feeling, that there’s absolutely no reason to hate this band one bit. And the lyrics put together by Roger Waters, it could only create a unique sound that belongs to a band ahead of its time, Pink Floyd. As I write this post, their live album from Pulse is playing in the background. I wonder what it is like to be young in the 70s, getting high on their music and growing up with them, I wonder what it’s like to see their live shows together as Pink Floyd. I can say that my parents are definitely lucky to be experiencing an era of love and peace. No wonder they’re always reminiscing about their childhood and how good it was. I wonder what we have here that is amazing? The ability to do things wirelessly? Our advanced technology. But honestly I wish nothing more than the simpler form of life. Without the shackles of social media, peer pressure from friends, and social upkeep. A life that is built on materialism. I think that’s why I can connect too well with the boyfriend. We have that similar vision when it comes to our perspective about life and how we intend to lead them.

Although I consider myself very tech savvy and technologically informed, I am definitely not a victim to it. These days you see the average consumers chasing for the latest gadgets, struggling with their social upkeep even though it actually serves a very minimal purpose to them. But I see technology as tools to make my life and work especially easier. Maybe it’s because my job has always centred around computers. It could be the reason… To the point when there were days where I just didn’t want to look at computers or screens for the rest of the day-haha! Sometimes he doesn’t understand how I could separate technology from my daily life. He hails himself as the type of person who does things at a somewhat primitive level and maybe because of that he is not the tech savvy type of person. And yes, he does take an incredibly long time to understand  and adapt to electronic means of doing things, recently discovering what it’s like to use a smart phone, but still (chuckle) not used to social media. Which I hope one day he will. Despite having the technology around us, we know when to put our phones and computers away. That’s the difference between us and them.

Next came the day when the boyfriend turns 31. I do look forward to this date a lot, this would be the second time this year. It’s always an important milestone. Birthdays. And it was a good day well spent. The funny thing is that I’m STILL deciding on his birthday present. He’s such a fusspot sometimes. I am still deciding. Hopefully he likes it. No I can’t say it here. It’s a secret. Duh.

And because I’m still having my ears tuned to Pink Floyd and the incredible solos of David Gilmour, I’ve been YouTubing his solos and cover solos of Comfortably Numb and then I realised – wow, David Gilmour turned 67 on 6th March! An old bloke, still looks charming, ageing gracefully and able to work his guitar magic. Seriously, what’s up with the men of March? Can I conclude that they’re all very talented?


As a tribute, I tried my skill at face portraits again. Not bad after many years.

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